I really want to cry, why didn't I realize? I know it was a one-sided thing, but really, I'm that stupid. I want to just cry my heart out for once, I've held it in for 3 days already. And I can't even sleep at night, my mind keep wandering else where. I guess it's simpler if... but I just can't help it. I know it's silly, stupid, or whatever you can think of. But well.... I guess it doesn't matter, does it? As time goes by... I can forget it. Even if I can't... what can I do? What can I do to change the fact? Nothing. But for now, I just can't understand that. Cause I fell too deep, none of you understand. I fell into too deep a hole, nothing, no one can pull me up except one. But it won't come, it just won't, no matter how much I cry out for it, it won't. Though my friends and family are all around me everytime, it's like I'm in my own small, crap, dark world alone. I may appear happy and cheerful but... haha, no one can see the real me inside. What's the use? I tell them I'm emo, I'm sad, then they come over comforting me. I rather be alone quietly, and just... be myself, my real self, for now, under my face of mask.